How to Set Boundaries with This Magic Word

If you want to set boundaries, you need to know how the whole miraculous process works.

Now, I don’t believe in magic pills, hype-y solutions or cookie-cutter formulas.

But I think I recently managed to identify the closest thing to a magic pill (hooray!)

It’s the solution to a lot of challenges I see clients struggle with (stress, lack of focus, overwhelm…).

Not only that, it may well be the first step to most things you want in life.

And while it’s not exactly easy, it’s so simple that even a two-year-old can do it.

Especially a two-year-old!

Ready?

No, it’s not Abracadabra.

It’s much easier to pronounce.

The magic word that helps you set boundaries is:

no!

(Or “non,” “nein” or whatever the equivalent is in the language you most often use.)

That’s right.

Do you want to be super-productive at work?
Begin by saying “no” to the things that are wasting your time. (Of course, avoiding all of them is often not possible but even a little can go a long way.)

Do you want to start a new business?
Begin by saying “no” to the things that take up your time and distract you from focusing on it. (This could include Social Media etc.)

Do you want to find the right person to be with?
Begin by saying “no” to the wrong people. (This may first require figuring out how to tell what category someone falls into.)

I think it is because it’s connected to priorities. By consciously saying “yes” and “no,” you can build a life based on your priorities.

Maybe you'd like to hear a bit more about why priorities are so crucial.

Well, today, many people have more freedom than at any other time in history—both in their personal and professional life. However, if you have an overwhelming number of options and no idea which one to choose, freedom of choice turns into a prison. True freedom comes from being clear on your priorities in life.

That's why priorities are one of the three key principles behind my work.

The bottom line?

Your “no” protects your “yes.” By saying no to what matters less, you make space for what matters most.

For more of my thoughts on this topic and practical advice for getting better at saying no, watch this video.

(There's also a Podcast version of "Saying No: Why It's Hard & How to Get Better" if you'd prefer to listen to this while exercising or commuting.)